Didn't go as planned

    So as the title says - everything didn't go as i planned it. I screwed up. He got scared ( i hope ). I pushed too far. Most of his friends started to put pressure on him so he told one of our class mates that he likes me just as a friend for now -  i don't know if my friend was sugar coating me  but his version was that he said that he wasn't ready yet. I mean it hurts even more because everyone around me was so sure that he liked me. - So as you can imagine that i was a bit devastated for the whole weekend and the first week. It wasn't just the fact that he didn't like me but the thing that i fear the most did happen. He ignored me for the first week. Barely spoke to me the first week and if he did he wouldn't look me in the eyes. It literally broke my heart because i didn't want to lose him as friend.I cried in school, i cried at night and i was just so sad. I felt like it was my fault.

     Now it has been for like two weeks i think. One of my best friends suggested that i just give him time. So i gave him time. I tried time from time to talk with him but it wasn't going anywhere so i just decided to wait for him.  And yesterday he talked to me for the first time like for real. He looked me in the eyes and smiled and spoke to me!  I was supper happy. And today he spoke to me even more. I know i'm like getting hyped for such a little thing but honestly i'm just hyped if i can get him back even as a friend. I'm just gonna take it easy from now on and hope that he come through to me. 

    ¨

Right school. I have like two weeks left until the summer vacation. Until my work starts. I have so many essays to write and school work is just piling up. I'm super stressed ( when wouldn't i be? ). I actually should be studying right now but what am i doing? Writing about my non existing problems. Oh well. Maybe tomorrow.